setting intension becoming authentic

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I might have to stop trying to grok the New Age scene. I have been trying manfully to endure as much of it as I can take, that I might drop right into the lingo and symbolism that communicates to the set of all people lately referred to as Love 'n' Lighters... bliss ninnies... when/if I come across one who might be, you know, sincere. Spent a couple hours on one of the less unendurable outlets for that action today, and they kept going on about setting intention and authenticity being key.

They seem to thrive on certain words from the Zen canon. What is mandatory about one's intent has nothing to do with deciding. It isn't something one can refresh each day like underwear. And authenticity isn't something one can fashion like makeup. The point of mentioning these words isn't to make people reinforce their error, what they are already calling true. It's about loading the seeker with terms they will recognize later... when they start emerging from under the mountain of bad habit they used to assume was self.

You can't say your intent. That's identical to politicians saying things like all they want is the greatest good for the people, when it's blatantly obvious to anyone who will actually look that all they want is the greatest good for themselves. They want to be perceived as altruistic, sure enough, but it's clear that doesn't quite cut it in terms of gathering the wherewithal to make them and theirs as unassailably comfortable as possible. So next best is to be seen as virtuous while stockpiling booty.

The deal is: true intent is what creates karma, consequences. Not in the sense, particularly, of the individual whose intent is creating it, but in the sense of that intent releasing its karma on the world. Politicians' karma is sliming us from every direction. Yes, this general karma does keep putting itself in front of each of its progenitors, each of us, until we learn, but I don't want to go through all the crap in the if-karma-is-valid-why-do-motherfuckers-not-all-die-of-their-motherfucking? thing.

I can say my intent behind getting coffee is to wake up, but the true intent is my love of it. I can say my intent behind going to bed is to blank out the world, but the true intent is to arise stronger. I can say my intent behind blogging is to "find the others", but the true intent is to toss out bits that might shed light for anyone in need of it. I might say that crap to fit a situation, or even make a show of setting my intension on that crap to fit a situation, but the truth behind that crap is already set, is what it is. It is me. I can't say it into existence. It already exists and is only obscured by that transparent crap I was pretending to intend or saying just to be colorful or even saying to fit the situation.

My true intent behind working all these years for enlightening being is enlightening being. I can't say my way around that. I can't set that. I can't call myself authentic. My intent is what it is and I can't say myself into it. If I want to be authentic, I have to stop trying to do that shit. I have to start subtracting the bullshit. Shedding the habits. Not putting on airs, and that includes not playing pious and humble and gracious and mild and world-loving and ascension-bent and whatever other bliss markers that make fuming maniacs feel safe to interact meaninglessly.

I think what I love the most about Chunky Mark, The Artist Taxi Driver is that he doesn't waste my life with all that bullshit saying [lying]. Truly. I've never heard him going on about what a dear he is inside, how much good stuff he wants for everyone, yadda, yadda, yadda. It's perfectly crystal clear without him going on about it. I also appreciate that he recognizes the state of emergency and conducts himself accordingly.