part of my anger

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Was my desperation to hear the real thing. Decades on the desert, beyond sweating, I've been watching my cells turn to dust. Suddenly, I couldn't keep going through the "dharma" blatherer's mountains of crap, looking for a jewel or finding points to bring up and cut to ribbons, and started googling around for Zen centers with audio files of their dharma talks to try to paint an abstract of the hierarchy of charlatanry that constitutes Western Buddhism.

I was about it for quite some hours, when I suddenly decided that if I couldn't find a master in whose voice I could relax completely, I was going to fall into a pile of dust and blow away.

Trungpa. Even though the sound quality is miserable and his tone debauched thereby, I gotta have it. So I found it and got in bed, drifting off shortly before YouBube would be sending me to someone else, someone they deemed to be on a par with Trungpa. I woke up to someone maybe even surpassing him, a Bhutanese Vajrayana master. Heh. Fancy that.

They are not all degenerate.

pipe up any time....