today in international fuckery

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I have been kept awake all night by severe leg cramping. It woke me up about ten times after I'd fallen asleep at a reasonable hour, and finally, I just got the hell up and made myself some hot cocoa. Then sat down and wrote a dissertation to a friend with a mentally ill kid. Then went in to pee and ripped my urethra passing a monster BLADDER STONE.

I never even knew you could get those, but this might be the upshot of the missing kidney stone that had been stuck in a ureter right before they blew up my guts last year. I'd kept asking what was going on with that stone and they told me they did not know, but it was gone. I thought I was lucky I'd been knocked out for all the washing of my guts and sewing me back together and at least missed the kidney stone pain.

And I know that leg cramps do not come from kidney stones or bladder stones. I had to google it to see if it was a real thing, and it must've been sitting in there quite a while because it was so seriously not small. Practically black and sitting in the bottom of the toilet. I had to fish it out. It's about half a centimeter on one side and maybe almost a centimeter on another side and under a half a centimeter on the third side, maybe a quarter of a centimeter wide. I'm bleeding. Jesus.

This better be the end of it. Goddammit!

pipe up any time....